Untolerable Working Conditions.

Let me give you the nooner wrap-up. It's not as dirty, or fun as it sounds.


I got to my classroom, after a particularly nasty 6:45 am dept meeting, to find that there were no more Diet Coke's in my mini-fridge. At the beginning of the day, I didn't think it would be a big deal. It's a short day. Certainly I can make it to lunch, grab a diet Coke from the machine, no big deal. (Even though I am morally and ethically opposed to drinking from plastic, but that's a whole other Oprah.) I reminisced about the days of yore....when I planned and prepared for the long cold winters. I longed for the days when I didn't work in BFE, but that got me nowhere.



At lunch, I went to the lounge for the nectar of sweet relief, and the maniacal machine blinked that empty red light back at me.




I judge this man no more.

Worse Things

Multiple updates coming soon....but just to recap....I am in Vegas, on Valentine's Day weekend, at a single's conference...and I just saw this.

The irony is not lost on me.

We'll talk about it later.

I guess it's funny to be a stoned 8 year old on the way home from the dentist...but this? This just makes me uncomfortable to watch.
But I love that Dave it all over Joaquin. He does not miss a beat. And did you notice, Letterman agrees with me and the gum chewing. It's annoying.

Where are Joaquin's friends? How have they not had a sit down with him? He's just making me sad, now. I'm hoping it is a Kaufman-esque hoax. Please...I'd be sad to really see Joaquin go this way.

Is This Real Life

Ohhh big thank you to Sara for posting this on her blog, so I could steal it for mine. But have you seen this kid? He, might be the funniest stoned kid in the whole world.

I secretly think this is a big reason why some people have kids...so they can record them doing funny things and put it on the internet.

Good luck little buddy, it is real life. It sure it.

He Should Be That Into Me!

I found this gem, on ye ol' interweb, and have been tossing it around in my head all morning. The idea of telling a story in six words is not a new one. Ernest Hemingway did it with, "For Sale: baby shoes, never worn." Nevertheless, Smith magazine is putting out the second collection of six word stories. This time they are about love, being that time of year and all. I think it's a pretty fun idea. Not because it is about love and heartbreak, inspite of that, more likely. The idea of boiling a story, situation, or event, down to six words kind of makes you think about which pieces are most important. I wonder if the writers of He's Just Not That Into You realized they had coined a phrase perfect for the the six word challenge.

Some of the others that I found particularly good/funny/heartfelt...

He sees the me I don't.
- Anon

I finally threw away his toothbrush.
- Fershleiser

Inevitably, his obituary didn't mention me.
- R. Sue Dodea

If only he wasn't a Republican.
- Holly Fitzpatrick

and finally,

If I get Chlamydia, blame MySpace.
- Hanorah Slocum

I'm not sure if Hanorah's six words make me laugh or make me sad. I think they make me sad. I think some courses in self esteem might do her well.

Feel free to sum up your love life, or your antilove life, in the comments. Try it! It's fun. Promise.

That's How The Cows Do It

Am I the last person on the planet who was raised properly?

And by that, I mean smacked in the back of the head if I chomped my gum like a cow.

Rainy Days and Mondays

That title no longer applies as it is now SNOWING. Again. Yes. Huge. Freaking. Bitterly. Cold. Flakes. The novelty has worn off. Snow is no longer exciting or snuggely and romantic. I am cold and I am sick of it. And we didn't even get to go home from school early! Just so ya know.

Self Portrait

Except I am more exhausted....less peaceful.